I called out of work sick today and my manager’s response was “ugh, really? well if you feel better later come in and close the store.” Granted, I’m not really sick, I just didn’t feel like going in because I’ve already technically quit, but I said “ok” and hung up on that inconsiderate bitch.
I gave my two weeks notice a couple days ago so my last day of work is the day before Thanksgiving.
But my manager asked me if I’d be willing to come back and work a 10 hour shift on Black Friday because I’m the only full time employee in my department and I’m also one of the last experienced people left. I almost said yes, but then he yelled at me today for going on my break 10 minutes late.
I was all, “Hold on, you want me to do you a favor and postpone starting my new job that pays me more to help you out, and you have the nerve to yell at me?” I like to do this adorable little thing where I don’t do nice things for people who treat me like shit, so fuck that. I hope those shitheads go out of business.
I went to a football game last night and some guy grabbed my ass…
My friend and I drove home from Boston and her mom gave us tickets to the Eagles/Bears game, but neither of us knows anything about football stadium seating, so naturally, we had a hard time finding our seats. While I was trying to figure out which row we belonged in, I felt a hand grab my ass. At first I thought it was my friend, but she had already found our seats and was walking towards them, and when I looked to see who had groped me, the asshole had the audacity to smile in my face like what he did was supposed to be flattering. I knew there was nothing I could say that would teach him that what he had done was wrong because, 1. I can never think of anything clever to say when my head is spinning with anger and 2. the stadium was too loud for him to hear me anyway. But I wasn’t about to let him get away with that, especially in front of so many people. So I punched that stupid mother fucker in his face and walked away. I’m not a huge fan of violence, but if someone touches me without my permission, I’m handling it however I can. My mother taught me that if a man disrespects me, I have to put him in his place, so that’s what I did. And maybe now he at least partially understands that he can’t go around putting his hands on complete strangers.
I heard someone say “yeah, Iggy’s kinda like Kreayshawn only Australian” and I almost had a fucking conniption.
so a guy messaged me on okcupid and i took the time to respond because he was actually really cute and he asked me out and i said yes but we haven’t set up plans yet but if he doesn’t respond to my yes i will hunt him down and force him to take me to a chinese buffet because im a nice girl and i deserve nice things.
I always wonder what judges would tell Taylor Swift if she weren’t already famous and auditioned for a show like American Idol or The X Factor…
Meanwhile, Casey Anthony is still too busy popping bottles and getting tattoos that represent how beautiful her life is to look for whoever really killed her baby. SMfuckingH.
everyone on glee has an attractive significant other, and mercedes is single the whole time, finally dates the big lipped white boy for literally 30 seconds on the last episode of last season, and then comes back dating…rick ross? you know what…
So here’s how my day went:
- Male coworker old enough to be my father informs me that he knows I’m kinky because I have a lipring, tells me I should take him out to a movie…I will be getting him fired for sexual harassment and/or suing the company. I’ll let you know how that goes.
- Notice a growing trend amongst customers where they bring final purchases to the register and allow me to start ringing them out, walk away from the register and continue to shop. I will kill them all.
- Child running around my department screaming and knocking things over while his parents gave no fucks. Contemplated tripping him. Didn’t, but I should have.
- While a manager instructed me on how to fold clothes, I decided I’m starting my own business because I can no longer work for people who are less intelligent than me.
It kind of bothers me when the people who think Lady Gaga and Katy Perry are stylish turn around and call Nicki Minaj ghetto for wearing the same type of outfits.
I hate when girls complain about Forever 21’s clothes being too cheap.
Uh…yeah, that’s the point.
Uh…no, getting pregnant isn’t like baking a cake. There isn’t a recipe to follow. Women who get married before having children aren’t necessarily better mothers or people than women who don’t. And his father (Diddy, in case you didn’t know) has had children with multiple women and has never been married, so that would mean he’s throwing his own mother in with the women he’s trying to slut-shame. Nice try, buddy.
I don’t really give a shit about Tyler the creator and I don’t listen to Odd Future, but I would be willing to bet that a good percentage of the people who are pissed about MTV “honoring” his music (they gave him a metal moon man shaped statue, breathe easy) because he raps about rape and murder, are the same people who listen to Eminem rapping about killing his ex-wife and also agree that he’s the best rapper alive. I’m not condoning violent, hateful lyrics or whatever, but it’s a fucking VMA. He didn’t get a Nobel Peace Prize. Stop stressing over it and don’t listen to it. Seriously, be easy.
New Jersey Bridal Store Refuses To Sell A Wedding Dress To Lesbian
A woman went with her family to buy a wedding dress, found the perfect one and filled out the order form in the store. When doing so she crossed out “groom” and wrote in “partner”. The store owner called her up and told her she wouldn’t sell her the dress and that she should be ashamed that she’s gay because she comes from a nice Jewish family. The store owner also took the extra step of leaving the woman a voicemail informing her that gay marriage is illegal and that she does not participate in illegal activity.
Yeah, because selling a wedding dress to a lesbian is like selling alcohol to a 13 year old. Good job, Captain Logic.
I’ve been in Atlantic City with my friends since Sunday and all week we’ve been getting hit on by gross, slimebuckets. At first it was a little obnoxious but now it’s making us kind of curious as to how some men think. I want to ask the next guy that hits on me if he’s ever asked a woman how she met her husband and had her respond with, “you know, I was just walking down the boardwalk in Atlantic City, and this man was screaming ‘HEY, BABY!!!!’ at me from a mile away, so I turned around and it was love at first fucking sight and now we’re happily married!” How has screaming at a woman for her attention ever worked out for anyone? I don’t understand what the fucking issue is here. You can’t just, I dunno, approach me quietly, say hello, and then strike up a conversation? WHY MUST YOU SCREAM COMPLIMENTS AT ME FROM A DISTANCE AND THEN INSULT ME WHEN I DON’T GIVE YOU A POSITIVE RESPONSE?! I know my outfit looks good, or else I wouldn’t have worn it and I’m not thanking you for noticing that I have big tits and a nice ass, I’ll call my mother up later and thank her. Fuck off.
